jeunesse’s Stuff!

   Today marks the first year of my return to Vancouver after enduring the fast paced, glamourous, and yet deserted life I had experienced in Las Vegas. Cynical as it may seem, some people die for that party atmosphere.  Some expect fast rewards from these casino slots, and to some, it is a shelter for temporary good time, a place to explore various facets of sexuality, money and greed.  For me, It was a place to find myself, and experience my first few years of married life..being away from the norm.   I can’t help but to think, where those years have gone, mingling with the "high society", getting to know my cocktails, and brushing shoulders with the "in crowd" to mention a few, the guy who patented the silicone band for bariatric surgery (a surgical weight loss), the guy who owns a large scale manufacturing plant for breast implants, and the infamous lawyer who is an advocate for the republican party and golf course owner, in which his house was a mecca for pro-BUSH parties, and a yacht which is a dome for fishing parties for the executives only.  It was seemingly unreal to be one of the "members".  I was one of those house-wives.  I’ve reaped the benefits of attending popular concerts, first class- treatment in the bars,luncheon parties, and never ending wine and dine on top rated restaurants. I came to know the Armani’s, Gucci’s and LV’s and the Dior’s, It was good while it lasted.

   Ironically,I don’t see myself dwelling in all of these so called "lifestyle". I was quickly missing home, finding myself back more and more in California where my cousins are. What used to be a weekend visit, would last me a weekend and then some—all of them kept me sane and intact!!! I found out what life’s essential’s are, going back to nature and finding my roots, I found out who my friends are, (the people that kept me company and visited me on this whole journey, and provided me with frequent phone calls and msn notes) and most of all… I found out who I can call "my family" amidst the fork in my road. (you guys know who you are–)

…thats where it all comes down to.  Slowly but surely, I got myself back in BC where indeed my heart belongs!  Enduring the 18 hour drive to BC was quite a ride, however–Vegas is the ultimate ride in my lifetime!

   To my hubby, thanks for making it happen…and to LV may you R.I.P.

   This whole day light savings time is making me off, lagged and odd.  Coming to work today, I found myself unenergized despite entering into "stimulating" and therapeutic conversations with my clients.  I usually find them amusing and interesting, exploring the delusional systems particularly with "jane doe" a 65 year old woman,  who requested an urgent appointment with me.  My day started with her answering machine messages, telling me how she wants to be involved with this "other man" who ironically is a fragment of her imagination.  I mean give me a break now…how can you actually have sex with a man who is invisible, non existing, life less, and totally is out of this world–with some pun intended.  (unless of course for your own personal gain–you folks know what i mean..ahah)but seriously, how can I ever convince this woman that "this man" is not at all in this face of the earth! ( proven after thorough investigations back up by Docs ofcourse.)  For "jane doe" this is more a crisis, that can gradually be solved by urgent reality check.  And what am I supposed to do as her therapist??? Damn, people, I work as a therapist and not a pimp! 

    She describes her inner thoughts as seemingly real, and untainted by any false information that I have provided her.  (how rude!–then why attend my sessions then?)  It does make me wonder, now a 65 year old woman with 2 grown up children and a "boring" husband..it all makes sense, this woman is repressed, and delusional of course!!! My only hope is not to be as close as this 65 year old woman when I get to that stage…  as what that say "unleash your inner sanctum!"

   In the mean time, all I can focus on is how to get rid of my tired and sleepy eyes.  This day light savings screwed me, it also screwed the thinking and the utterly delusional materials of jane doe.  Another hopeless case!